DRIFTWOOD

'NEO-MISANTHROPE BLUES'

I see you drifting; 
Drifting away. 
Far away. 

I'm moving away from you; 
Still standing firm
On my slice of driftwood.

Am I one for groups? 
I'm not follower, nor leader. 
Am I one to 'belong'?

I'm not always comfortable
Revealing the full contents 
Of my overcharged mind. 

I'm content this must be so. 
But at the same time? 
Truly devastated. 
  
Do I belong elsewhere, now?
A dilettante Diogenes 
In a cabin made of driftwood?

 

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WHITE HORSES

'INELUDIBLE'
 
I can't see the tidal wave 
But I know that it is coming. 
I can't hear the tidal wave 
But I know that it is coming. 

I can't prepare, or hide from it
But I know that it is coming. 
I don't know when it will arrive
But I know it will be soon.

Soon my mind will be haywire:
A dark, chaotic miasma
Of brutal images and feelings
Will obscure my view of the world.

The minor considerations of life?
They cease to contain meaning.
The tenderness I feel for others?
Mostly frozen in stasis.

I hold tight to my small fixations
And to my minor eccentricities;
They're not much to be proud of
But I feel they're all I have.

I try to calm my mind and body
Aware that trying is not enough;
I know the tidal wave is coming
And my fear holds supremacy.

 

CONTRARIWISE

With thanks to Mr Jeff for the general idea....

 
'SPECULUM'

semitemoS 
eW evil ruo sevil kcab ot tnorf;
slegnA dna snomed ekat snrut
gnissiP no ruo spihc. 

sgabtihS lluf fo ysircopyh
erucsbO eht taerg ytuaeb 
tahT semoc htiw gnicaf 
ehT tnasaelpnu shturt nihtiw su.

esaelP
t'noD tuohs ruoy eutriv os ylduol;
esuaceB I thgim eb detpmet 
oT eveileb eht etisoppo.

 

MISSING: UNDENIABLY

'ME, YOU & I'

I can't deny I'm missing you;
I fear that my mind's gone missing.
It's ran away to the pub on its own,
Leaving me struggling like an oaf
To connect thoughts with words.

I can't deny I'm missing you; 
I can't tell you how much I enjoy
Your wisdom, passion & artistry.
Plus your flawed humanity
That I share.

I can't deny I'm missing you; 
I want to improve my articulation 
And general clarity of thought. 
'Til I do, don't mistake quietness
For disinterest. 

I can't deny I'm missing you; 
My favourite seasons will come again.
Until they do, creativity must wait. 
But I am, at first and last, 
Still here.

LONELINESS: THE QUIETEST EXPOSION

One of the most beautiful, bittersweet things I’ve read in a long time….

The High Octane Shine Blog

Loneliness is the quietest explosion you’ll ever [not] hear

tumblr_mwzcooGV4r1t04gt3o1_500

It explodes peacefully in never-ending waves; breaking against the shoreline of our hearts

There is no sound of exploding on the outside

The sound is all on the inside

We are alone and at one with that sound

The hurt sits concealed and contained under our sagging skin

No one knows we are feeling lonely, unless we say we are

But we don’t say we are, do we

Loneliness is something which is felt, but rarely expressed or shared

Maybe you can imagine I’m lonely by the bowed head, the down-turned once sparkling now grey eyes, the way my shoulders slump and my wrists turn inward- protecting myself, not letting anybody in; because we don’t expect anyone to want to be let in

Or maybe you are too busy to notice me, after all I am invisible, aren’t I?

or at least I feel I am

That…

View original post 353 more words

ENDGAME

'NIGHTFALL GAMBITS'

Words, words, words.
Words pouring from my sore head 
Onto the screen; black on white.
Not quite a symphony in ink; 
But near enough, yes? 

Too many doubts and fears? 
Too much crap clogging up 
The pipes in your mind? 
LET IT OUT [!]
Clean out the rotten system.

All the people
Picking apart pain;
Chugging the balm
From sleek Olympian chalices; 
Calming nectarous merriment.

But fear is invading; 
A fleet of scares and sorrows
Including the fear of fear itself:
Muscles twitch and limbs shake; 
Will I be whole again?

Three colours of my moods:
Gold, silver and blue.
Not enough of the former,
Too many of the last: 
Improvement needed fast.

Hope for the best. 
Pray for the best. 
Prepare for the worse. 
It was ever thus.
Wasn't it?

Trapped. 
Twice trapp'd: 
Alone on the outside;
Alone on the inside. 
Doubly damned?

Set up the board, nicely. 
Do I play for checkmate? 
Stalemate? 
Zugzwang?
Or another option?

I move my pieces;
So does my opponent. 
I simply don't want to lose.
But is that enough?
Enough for victory?

Wednesday continues apace. 
Hours are long, days are short;
The sun will soon set in the west.
Just a game -- but the result? 
Time will tell.

 

OXYGEN TANK TUESDAY?

Just stopping by here in the middle of trying to cope with a too-full In-Tray, and realising that I need to come here and spend more time reading all my fellow bloggers' fine posts... 

I'm rapidly coming to the conclusion that Tuesday is the cruellest day of the week(!) 



'OVERLOADED'

Wires? Crossed. 
Fuses? Blown. 
Circuits? Shorted. 
Thoughts? Contorted. 
Psyche? Bent. 
Mind? Melted. 

Give me time, from time to time;
Give me space to breathe: 
Wonderful, much-needed oxygen 
For lungs, skin, mind and soul.